Boyhood and Fatherhood

 

Today being Father’s Day the 18th of June 2023, we have heard a lot about who indeed a father is? My friend trying to define who a father is, she answered in her words and I quote:

tomorrow is for Men that have the courage to stay and carry responsibility of a child.  Not for baby dads who can only show penis as manhood

 

We really do not understand what is going on to the men of our generation, they are no longer around to witness the development of their children anymore. This post is really not focused on that but on what transforms a boy from a boy to a Man. We could gather from our little findings that what transform boys to fathers is their ability to take responsibilities. I want to believe that most of the men find themselves into Fatherhood without adequate preparation so the best and the easiest way out of the situation is to run away. Many of the boys got no sex education and are not just equip on how to handle responsibilities or when to prepare for responsibilities. To save us this emotional and social sickness, let me take the time to comment on what our blog has pushed out to educate men on how to get prepared and other tips that could help them become good fathers equipped with vital knowledge and not just a proof of waking up with an erection.

We had examined prostrate cancer in men, if you are getting to the age of 40 years, I would advise you to go check your prostrate. For more about prostrate cancer, you can check our post Prostate Cancer for details. We also put out Men’s magic, the benefit of Sex, Semen and very important Safe Period. You need to read that post as a man to help you prepare for the Journey toward raising a family Safe-Period. Another interesting post is "There is a way out" and lot’s more to educate the men. Now let me just put a few words for the men to arm themselves in the process of metamorphosising to fatherhood.

The whole process begins with puberty which I wouldn’t discuss here but just point out some pit falls that we sometimes do not take note of and we put ourselves in unnecessary troubles. I would talk about the issue of wet dreams and one STI we need to be careful about that could affect fatherhood in future and that is Syphilis.

The concept of wet dreams in Nigeria culture has a superstitious side to it. We noticed because of the fact that parents shy away from teaching their children sexual education, they tend to confined in their friends when they go through the process of developing into manhood. When I sample a few opinions about the concept, I notice the general superstition of wet dreams is that the man is having sex with a witch or a spirit being at Night so he needs to pray hard to stop the process. Wet dreams are erotic dreams that causes involuntary ejaculations of semen from a male child. The funny part of the dreams is that one sometimes sees ladies they know in reality in their dreams and eventually when they wake from the dream, they tag them as witches. Let me try and clear the air that this is not entirely true. The body produce sperm cells in billions of cells and these cells have a life span. When a child especially the one who is just attaining puberty is growing, one would not expect him to be sexually active. So the process the body uses in expelling the sperm cell is through the dreams. Just that we shy away from it, even most people from the faith saw their first semen through wet dreams but are just ashamed not to tell you because they met the myth or superstition and it was passed to them and  have been able to spread to even this woke generation.

When a young man starts having wet dreams and seeing his semen, he could be a teenager, but possess the potential of putting a woman in a family way. There is a very thin line for the individual between boyhood and fatherhood. At this point, he has to be armed with a lot of information to enable him take responsibilities. One of the frequent question asked by young men is “Can a lady get pregnant on just having it for the first time? Or can just the tip get her pregnant?” Young blood, the first time can produce a bouncing baby boy or girl. Even the tip can lead to pregnancy. The fact that your mates are doing it and getting away with it might mean they could be lucky to meet on safe period, we already posted on safe period and recommend you to harm yourself with the knowledge of your partners safe Period. For the tip, it is also possible for the tip to lead to pregnancy. There is one form of ejaculation called precum that comes when one is having sexual intercourse, that enough is able to form a child and get a lady pregnant. The best and protected way to having sex without having to worry so much about pregnancy or STI/STD is to use a Condom. Because of the campaign on condom, we according to popular opinion believe condoms are only for men. It might interest you to know that women also have condoms – Female condoms.

When you become sexually active, and you have the experience of comparing protected sex and unprotected sex, one tends to prefer unprotected sex (I mean sex without the condom). They devise a way to prevent pregnancy using different method like: the withdraw method, safe period, emergency contraceptive etc. But they forget that apart from protecting oneself from pregnancy, one also need to protect themselves from STI/STD. STI is an acronym for Sexually Transmitted Infection while STD stands for Sexually Transmitted Disease. 

We have lots of these STI/STD, but I just want us to discuss one. I wouldn’t talk about the most scary one (HIV/AIDS) but we discussed something on it in one of our blog post which I titled: "When Hope Unborn is Dead". We shall discuss Syphilis in this blog post. It is a bacteria infection that could be treated, but if it is not treated in male or female; it could go a long way in causing infertility in the future; dening young male child from crossing from boyhood to fatherhood. It shows up as a sore in the genitals of the young man or the places infected. If not treated like we do in Nigeria, we like to take things for granted unless it gives us too much discomfort, we allow Sore heal by itself. It has the ability of healing itself in 2-6 weeks even left untreated. This could later develop into epididymitis which leaves scars on the sperm duct and prevent sperm from being released during ejaculation, this causes male infertility. 

Before you can cross into the stage of boyhood to fatherhood, you need education for yourself. Education you might not likely get from your parents or pairs because they are also ignorant or misinformed. We know we prepare a little for our girl child because when they get pregnant outside wedlock, it brings shame on us as parents and we neglect the boy child. The boy child also need some guidance to choose sexual abstinence or protection while on his journey of fornication. And when he is ready to start raising family, he should be equipped with knowledge to helping him.

Please don’t forget to leave your comment and follow the blog. Your comments would help us with follow-up post to keep you entertained. So, let me leave with the closing note of Jerry Springers, “Take care of yourself and each other”.